A few of our memories....

04/22/2005

To the entire Harms and Nesse families as well as all of Kurt’s friends, I am so sorry for your loss!  I feel like we only knew Kurt a short time and yet were blessed so much by his presence.  He will live on in our hearts!

My family has known Kurt for about 7+ years.  We met him shortly after Dana began working for Hughes in El Segundo.  We have 3 girls; Christina is 15, Catherine is 11, and Charlene is 7.  Our first get together involved several people bringing their computers to our apartment and hooking them all together so we could play.  He played Warcraft and who knows what else with us all but our girls instantly took to him and I believe the feeling was mutual.  There were a couple of those get together before it several people were relocated to Colorado.
Kurt arrived in Colorado later than we did.  Anyone that knew Kurt would understand that late was the norm for him!  We started getting together again at our house more and more to play games or do whatever.  We weren’t limited to only computer games.  There was so much more. 

Kurt would frequently join us for holiday dinners when he didn’t go home or get involved playing a game at home and lose track of time.  One year near Christmas, he joined us when we hosted some Japanese exchange students.  Another year, when Dana, the girls and I were in Japan for Thanksgiving, he came over and had dinner with my parents.  He really just became part of the family.  There were several other times when he’d just come over for dinner or games, always arriving carrying a 12 pack of Vanilla Coke.  I used to appreciate his compliments on my cooking but after some of the stories I’ve read about what he ate, well, maybe I need to consider the source!  There were also several times we’d just drag him along where ever our family was going.  I never realized how many of our friends knew him until this happened and we realized how many other people he had touched.

Three years ago we started going to Water World for Catherine and Charlene’s birthdays.  At first, when Dana and I talked about we thought--- 3 kids>2 adults!  The odds didn’t seem favorable!  So, the logical conclusion was to invite one more kid, Kurt who could keep up with the others!  That became our tradition each year since.  It was great to watch him play with the kids.  I laughed how Christina, then 12, managed to goad him into going down one of the drop off water slides.  If a 12 year old could do it, then certainly Kurt could.  Let’s just say they both screamed like little girls the entire way down!

One year, we ventured to Elitch Garden.  We not only took advantage of the amusement park but we alternated between there and the water park section.  I think this was the first time I learned Kurt was not invincible.  Dana and I wanted to go on one of the roller coaster and so Kurt joined us.  We had so much fun that when we got off, we decided to go again; particularly since there was no line.  Well, once on the roller coaster was doable for Kurt, but that second time turned him completely green!  He spent the next hour trying to convince the girls he really was okay, and perhaps himself too!

Another tradition we had was seeing the Lord of the Rings movies together.  I think we saw the first movie in the theater about a week after it opened but the 2nd and 3rd we went to on opening nights.  I was amused watching Catherine explain the parts he’d missed.  The night before the 3rd one debuted, we decided to watch the uncut version of the first 2 movies before seeing the 3rd.  Kurt came over and we all sat down to watch the movies.  At about 3 AM, Dana and I woke to Kurt getting ready to leave.  Dana and I had slept through most of the 2nd movie and Kurt had managed to stay awake!  They went to work the next day and we all went to see Return of the King that night!

We also got into playing the Lord of the Rings card game together.  This is one of those games where sometimes, the best constructed deck can be defeated by simple mistakes or even the luck of the draw.  There were many weeks when he’d come over only to be defeated by almost any of us.  He was always a good sport.

While the kids were awake, he was completely at their disposal, whether it was taking them for rides in his Z, listening to stories or running up and down the street with them on his shoulders.  Recently, he wanted to teach Christina to drive but with the laws the way they are he never had that opportunity---at least that they admitted to me! 

After the girls went to bed, we’d often stay up until 1 or 2 AM talking about anything.  It was great to watch him and Dana go back and forth.  Dana would say something as if ANYONE should know it and Kurt would basically show that he didn’t with one of his “What’s?” followed by a laugh!  Kurt loved to get Dana to make one of his peculiar looks as much as Dana loved to make Kurt laugh.

For our last visit with Kurt, he came over to dinner then we played a new game we had received for Christmas.  He also brought the family some gifts from Australia including kangaroo jerky, a clip on koala that hangs from the pull on our ceiling fan and he gave Christina an alarm clock for her birthday.  During the course of his visit, he took each of the girls for a ride in the Z with the top off (not necessarily a good idea in Colorado in January) and I think they even ended up at the park for a bit. The girls had received gift cards to Barnes and Noble from someone so Uncle Kurt took them shopping.  We talked about everything from taxes to TV shows!  As he was leaving we talked about him joining us for the next dance the girls team was having.  He had to cancel on that dance when he left for Australia on his final trip.

Kurt loved his work and whatever it was he was up to on this particular assignment, it was very interesting to him.  I could see him wanting to be able to share some cool stories related to work but then not being able to do so because of security issues.  I did find it amusing that when I poked around the internet for information about the area, that the sight he worked at, nicknamed Pine Gap, is often referred to as the “Area 51” of Australia!  Somehow it just fits with Kurt!

As I’ve gone through and written this I’ve realized several things.  The stories of Kurt that were so prevalent were part of what made him who he was but to me, and to my family I think, he was so much more than the stories.  He was larger than life!  The stories are incredible and I really think as his nephews grow older they will have a hard time believing they are all about one person and true.  It’s just all so unbelievable and yet, believable to those of us that knew him. 

I miss the Uncle Kurt who would play with the girls and then kick back and relax with the “old people” when they finally went to sleep.  I think about what a tragedy it is that he will never have children of his own but I’m thankful we got to share ours with him.  He was such a good family man. 

He was such a gift to us all and we will miss him terribly.  I’ve tried to grab on to anything I could that would make sense of this tragedy and so maybe this will help some of you.  Last week, I was at a funeral and there was a reading from Wisdom.  It said, “The souls of the just are in the hands of God.” Kurt was a just man and so I believe that he is with God and he’s probably laughing, not believing all the fuss we are making!  Of course, we all know he was worth it!

Blessings and prayers,
Marion Moreland